PMSing Pandas
by 6flapjacks
Summary: Numbuh three gets her first period, and acts the way girls with their periods usually do. Bitchy. of course nobody told the guys that much. a funny little one shot


**A/n: ok this idea poped into my head when i read something similar but completely different. i dont know i thought i was funny to see how dumb 11 year old boys can be. right! disclaimer time. DISCLAIMER: i promise i dont own anything blah blah blah. ooook great. oh and hey, for you 3/4 fans, if you squit and examine it with a microscope, you'll be able to see 3/4! yaaay! oh wait but dont do that! 'cause then you'll see all sorts of pairings that aren't there and we'll have to send you in for hallucinations. alright so this is it, ENJOY :)**

* * *

"What am I going to dooo Numbuh five? I'm dyyyyying!" Numbuh three sobbed into the phone. On the other line, Numbuh five couldn't help but chuckle a little bit .Kuki the drama queen.

"Calm down Numbuh three. Sounds like you just got your period." Abby said leaning back against the wall and spreading her legs out wide on the floor.

"m-my what?" Kuki whispered into the phone, having calmed down upon learning that she was in fact not dying.

"Ya know, you're period. " Numbuh five tried to explain, but as soon as the words left her lips she realized that her oriental friend most likely did not know. "Here, let Numbuh five explain," she sighed. Kuki, who was sitting on her bed, hugging the life out of one of her precious rainbow monkeys, 'oo'ed and 'ahh'ed as Numbuh five explained what happens to the female body during the menstrual cycle.

"You see? Numbuh five told you it's nothin' to be afraid of. Now here are some things you need to know. It'll last for 5 to 7 days. You're going to get cranky. I mean real cranky. And you're going to have crazy mood swings. Oh, and you're going to crave wacky food. At least… that's what Numbuh five thinks Cree told her…" Abby trailed off trying to remember.

"Oooh I get it!" Numbuh three said fully recovered from the hysterics only 10 minutes earlier. Numbuh five chuckled. In the background she could hear Cree yelling that she needed the phone _again_

"Look Numbuh three, Numbuh five's gotta go" she said eyeing the door that Cree was pounding upon"I'll see at the tree house tonight?"

"Yup" Numbuh three giggled "bye Numbuh 5!" Abby clicked the phone shut.

"Man, Numbuh five is glad she don't got her period yet" she mumbled as she got up. She shuddered and went to give her sister the phone

* * *

"HAHA! Ah win again!" Numbuh four cheered jumping up on the couch while the other operative sat glumly, with his arms crossed mumbling "you wouldn't have won if you played fair." Numbuh five glanced over at the two boys and shook her head. She turned her attention to her leader who was looking at his watch _again_.

"Numbuh one, I thought I told you, Numbuh three is gunna be late!" she sighed placing her hand on her hip

"Huh? Oh I wasn't waiting for Numbuh three. I was…um...checking to see if it's time for my show!"

"Oh yeah? What show?" Abby knew her leader was smart, but what he had yet to learn (for some unknown reason) was that she was smarter.

"Uhh..." Numbuh one rubbed the back of his bald head trying to think of a show that was later than 8 o'clock

"Mmmhmmm" Numbuh five said raising an eyebrow at the brit before returning attention to her magazine

"ALRIGHT! I'M HERE!" Numbuh three screamed as she flung open the tree house door enraged

"About time! Ya know you were suppose to be 'ere like two hours ago, rioght? Ah- ah mean everyone's been waitin' for you" Wally said pausing the game he was playing with Hoagie and turned around to the Japanese girl, obviously unaware of her current mood.

"SHUT IT WALLABEE!" she yelled as she stomped toward her room "NOBODY DARE BOTHER ME FOR THE NEXT 5 TO 7 DAYS!" she waved her arms around in the air for dramatic effect. As soon as she was around the corner, she popped her head back around "oh and thanks guys" she said in her sweetest voice with a smile on her face. The three boys sat wide eyed and speechless as they listened to Kuki stop to her room and slam the door.

"Geez, what's got her pantyhose in a knot?" Hoagie frowned turning to his friends. Numbuh one rubbed his chin looking distressed

"something is terribly wrong" He announced after he felt he had paced and appeared to be in deep deep thought for enough time " perhaps it's negative Numbuh three-"

"Or maybe she's sick" Hoagie chimed in

"Or maybe, it's a robot and ah- ah mean we have ta fight it!" Numbuh four kicked and punched the air. The three boys couldn't help but be utterly confused when Numbuh five burst out laughing

"Numbuh five robots are no laughing matter." Numbuh one said very seriously

"Numbuh five'll tell you a secret." She managed to say in-between laughs "Numbuh three is not a robot and she's not sick and is most defiantly not negative. Numbuh three is PMSing"

"PMSing? What is the meaning of this? Numbuh 2 find out!" he demanded. Numbuh two ran to the computer to access the acronym dictionary of KND, but when he typed it in, nothing happened.

"There's nothing here Numbuh one." Nigel looked dismayed

"Alright team, we're going to have to think…" and with that he placed his hand back on his chin and started to pace. Numbuh four scratched his head. What begins with the letter P…

"Pandas…" he whispered

"That's it Numbuh four! Oh why didn't I see it before? PMS stands for Panda mutation syndrome! Numbuh three is turning into a panda!" Nigel cried out. Abby chuckled

"Numbuh five isn't gettin' involved" she said raising her magazine higher to cover her face as if to say 'I'm not here'

"Numbuh one! Is there anything that can be done?" gasped Hoagie his hands on his cheeks

"I'm afraid not Numbuh two." Numbuh one said sadly shaking his head. He sighed "I think we all should go tell Numbuh three that it's ok and that's she'll still be our friend, and then, well, then we'll just have to leave her alone and wait for the transformation to be complete." He looked down in sadness " Numbuh four I think you should go first." Numbuh one nodded at him

* * *

Kuki lay crying in her room along with all her billions of stuffed animals. Crying was PMSy, right?

"Eh, Kuki? Can ah come in?" Numbuh four said standing in the door walk. She didn't respond, she just gave him the mother of all dirty looks "look, ah know what's happenin' 'ere. Ah know 'bout ya PMS."

"you do?" she whispered looking up at him

"Yeah, and ah just want ya can still be an operative when it's ova."

"Huh? What do you mean." She cocked her head to the side. Oh no! She thought to herself, was having periods teenager stuff? Oh gosh!

"Ya know, when ya turn inta a panda. I don't care what anybody's got ta cruddy say, Numbuh one said we can be the kids and the panda next door." He said nodding his head, trying to encourage her that he understood

"…what?" He could see the anger fuming up inside, her face turning red as she stood up

"Er, when ya, eh, turn inta a, er, panda?" he stuttered leaning back trying to get out of the way of the wrath of Kuki

"I AM NOT TURNING INTO A PANDA" she screamed nearly braking his ear drums and letting the people in Russia know in the process.

"B-b-but n-Numbuh one said-"

"I DON"T CARE" she screamed, her face still red "NOW GET OUT!" she pointed to the door that Numbuh four, still quite shaken, backed towards slowly

"Oh! And Wally? Before you go, can you by any chance make me a sandwich?" She said sweetly

"Eh, sure, ah guess. With what?" Wally said confused by the sudden transformation

"Well, let's see, umm rainbow munchies, and mayo, and corn, and grapes (make sure they're peeled and sliced) and some apple sauce ( but not too much, just enough) oh! And cheese." She nodded in his general direction as he made a weak attempt at a smile and back out of her room

* * *

"Great Numbuh four you're back! Numbuh two why don't you go next?" Numbuh one said smiling when he saw Numbuh four walking down the hall way

"NO! Don't do it! Ah'm warnin' ya mate, she's a lunatic!" Numbuh advised his chubby friend franticly. Hoagie looked at Numbuh one as if to 'what the hell?' as Wally headed into the kitchen

"Um hey, Numbuh four? Whattcha maken' there?" Numbuh two said when he saw that the blonde had pulled out bead, mayo, rainbow munchies, corn from a can, apple sauce, and cheese.

"Huh? Oh a cruddy sandwich fa Kuki. One with cruddy rainbow munchies and stoopid mayo and cruddy grapes ( cruddy sliced and peeled) and cruddy corn-from-a-cruddy-can and stoopid applesauce ( but not too cruddy much) and cheese!" he mumbled

"Ah." Numbuh one nodded " I see her Panda appetite has set in. that's the classic meal for a panda." He rubbed his hands together

"But Numbuh three said she wasn't turnin' inta a panda" Numbuh four said looking up at his leader who just 'tsk'ed

"She's in denial. No matter, in 5 to 7 day's she'll be fine and fully transformed."

"What on earth are you talkin' about Numbuh one? Are you _still_ goin' on about numbuh three turnin' into a panda?" the dark skinned girl, who was still laying on the couch groaned "that's it, Numbuh five don't wanna know! Numbuh five is goin' to her room!" she said picking up her magazine as she headed out. The three boys watched her leave, then looked at each other

"Um so, how did Numbuh three seem to you Numbuh four?" Nigel inquired in a meek voice. Wally looked at him with a look that made his blood run cold

"I'll help you peel those grapes!" Hoagie said jumping to it

"And I'll slice!" Numbuh one offered picking up a little knife

* * *

**_5 to 7 days later_**

"Hey Numbuh five!" Kuki said happily as she skipped down the hallway

"Numbuh three! Did your little visitor leave yet" Abby said lower her voice at the last part

"Yup all gone. I did everything just like you said I should." She grinned as her usual happy self. Abby on the other hand was not her usual self. She was dumbfounded

"Hold on, so you-" Numbuh three looked at her innocently, and Numbuh bust out into laughter. "Ya know, Numbuh five thinks you funnier than you seem, Numbuh three." She giggled, and Numbuh three just smiled, though she had no idea what Numbuh five was talking about.

* * *

**A/n: heeheehee. faked PMS symtoms? that's like an awesome joke to play on a guy haha. but hey, it's not what _i_ think it's about what _you_ think. and so you know the best way to tell _me_ what _you_ think? REVIEW! if you review i promise i will send you a thank you note AND a large cookie :). sounds like a deal to me! but really i like reviews, they make me feel speacial. sooo thanks for reading, hope you liked it :)**

**-6flapjacks over and out **


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